Tribute to Ted Kennedy
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As many here at Swords Crossed are aware, I am a steadfast advocate for following the Golden Rule. So much so, in fact, that I assume that my political opponents are all honorable people who, themselves, likewise follow the Golden Rule. As such, I feel duty bound to treat Democrats and "liberals" the same way that they are treating people on my side of the political aisle. The logic being, of course, that since my opponents are following the Golden Rule that they must be treating me the way that they, in fact, want to be treated themselves.
I was surfing around the web looking for a piece of humor to mirror the satirical humor so often found on the liberal side of the web but from a right wing point of view. I found this piece from a random blogger who shall remain nameless on a website that shall likewise remain nameless, which fits the bill perfectly.
The author, not unlike myself, is angry about how cruel satirists can be when making their points. As such, the piece that follows targets left-wing satirists and their art by demonstrating the cruel realities of how their pieces are perceived by their political opponents.
BEGIN PIECE BY: Random Blogger at Random Site dot COM.
A lot of you folks here like The Onion, right? So, in the spirit of this piece by The Onion here is some commentary on Ted Kennedy.
Not left wing enough for you? Here are some other fine examples of left wing "humor" that inspired this piece:
As you may, or may not, be aware Senator Ted Kennedy was recently diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor - although if it's in Teddy boy's brain it can't be much of a tumor, right, I mean how big could it be?!? The poor thing is probably starving. (Yuck, yuck, yuck. I got a million of 'em.)
I must say, it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy and this probably explains a lot of his behavior over the years, most recently that flopping fish impression of his over the weekend! (See what I mean? This guy is comedy gold.)
All these years we assumed that all that slurred speech was just the alcohol talking, but now we know it was just the tumor talking all along! BTW, I hear that the tumor probably boosted his vocabulary by 150%, so it was sort of a win-win for Teddy. (He he, having fun yet?)
But enough jokes at Ted's expense. Ted was quite the prankster in his younger days, like that time he drove off the bridge in Chappaquiddick for a joke, I bet Mary Jo was laughing all the way to the bottom. What a hoot he was, a million laughs. (BTW, could a malignant brain tumor explain those lost memories from that night instead of the alcohol? Maybe Ted can now just claim he had a seizure that night, eh? He's lucky like that, I bet the Democrats would believe it.)
But on a more serious note, we have to wonder how the tumor could have developed - I mean how did he contract it? Perhaps he got it from eating the shellfish after dumping all that diesel fuel into Nantucket Sound where I hear he sails a lot (which is why he opposes the wind farm that has been proposed there)?
On the other hand, some research shows that the Herpes Virus may have been to blame. Knowing Ted and his infamous frat-boy style antics I guess that wouldn't be that much of a stretch, for example:
Kennedy's womanizing ways are a Washington legend. When a supermarket tabloid published pictures of Kennedy getting "amorous" with a woman on his sailboat, one of his colleagues (Senator Howell Heflin) remarked that it appeared that Kennedy "had done changed his position on offshore drilling." In 1985, he and Connecticut Senator Chris Dodd allegedly made a "waitress sandwich" at a DC restaurant while their dates were in the rest room.
Kind of makes you think, eh? Where might Ted have been infected with herpes so it could travel to his brain? Hmmmm.
But in closing, Michael Savage played his own tribute to Ted on the day it was announced. It's not really my style, but you might like it. You can listen here: